Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Now I'm Moving Forward

So every once in awhile I like to colorfully complain and rant about things that bother me about where I'm at in this blog. Most of it is truth wrapped in the sweet candy shell of my sharp wit and use of unnecessary adjectives. So no, I'm not going through a mid-life crisis and yes, it's therapeutic for me to get it off of my chest...and yes I seem less like less of an asshole if I make it funny or at least entertaining in some way. Oh and when I say things like "everyone" and "all", I don't mean the entirety of people referenced. Like I hate anyone who rides a motorcycle if they've done 1 of 2 things:

  1. Dated a girl before me so I have to hold my "Computer experience and stable wage" up against "the freedom of the open road/the wind through my hair". Listen ladies...if you know someone who is cool or have dated someone who's cool or have done cool things, the worst way to try to get back that 40 cents an hour and the best way to kill boners is to tell your current boyfriend about it. It's a dick move and most times we like women because they traditionally lack in the "dick move" category. This has happened with every basically every woman I've ever dated and I've only recently pointed a finger and said out loud "Dick Move". We as mediocre men have a constant awareness of our positives and negatives. We don't need you or anyone to shine a big loud revving light on them. 
  2. Have ever ruined a quiet evening or morning that I was a participant in with your loudness.

See, this basically takes the entirety of the motorcycling community and narrows it down to like 50 people...most of whom live(d) in Ohio...most of whom live(d) in Northeast Ohio. So if you've never been here before, we can still be mates with 100% certainty. You can even drag a prostitute behind your motorcycle for giving you an STD and as long as it doesn't disturb a nice quiet time I'm enjoying nor is the prostitute a future girlfriend of mine...we be cool.

I have mental rules like this for lots of stuff. Like... I've just stopped washing silverware because it's too tedious and they're hard to see by visitors if it's just them in the sink so I look less like a slob. Gina does them (eventually) and I'm ok with every one having a little hardened food still on them. I just want to knock out the big dishes and have made the most progress for my effort. Ummm...I've just stopped caring about cars. I have a KIA Soul so yeah...just don't care about them anymore. I'll take a clown car and lease the shit outta it until I die. The only thing that's left in the car world that peaks my interest is the electric car. Oh I want one day to have enough money to buy an American car too. Upfront money and money for repairs earlier than anticipated. Ooooor I'm just never going to pet a pit bull...or go to a house where one is...or try not to think about them period. "Why?!? My pity is so nice and sweet!" Every once in awhile someone who has never done LSD but has lots of time to ponder his own life realizes one thing...if it's a bad thing that has odds of happening that's 1 and a very large number it happens to this guy >>> Me. I'm the 1. So to this point, I'm going to die from a piano being dropped out of a large building's window. Hopefully I pop up out of it in a dying breath moment with keys for teeth like in the cartoons! So ya, your pity is going to bite my face or genitals off. Nothing against you for adopting a modern day dinosaur. I just know how this book ends.

So with that explanation out of the way, I have all sorts of things in my life to be happy about. They just really aren't entertaining. They used to be. I partied my ass off for the first year and change of this little experiment. Now I'm coasting. I don't like it but reality is all about dealing with work, money, and home. We don't have enough something to something. Time, money, friends, drive, sleep... It really is a tough time and I hear about it every single day so there's no escaping from it. BUT...

It's nice out again...sorta...sometimes!
Public Square as of 5/3/16.

It's nice out sorta so I'm again willing to push against the still kinda cold wind in order to get from my free parking spot to the Higbee building for work. Passing the bum, the thick brush, the crumbling sidewalk, and constant RNC construction is the best way to prepare for work and your day in my opinion. I get a brisk 15-20 min walk depending on which lights I hit and that's great for my health! I get to wander on my break to a window and get a great birds eye view of the almost finished Public Square. It looks so much better and less like what Soviets thought everything should look like...concrete and square...oh and cold. 

I get to go out to lunch and walk some more. Pick a different area and travel a bit. Not everything downtown is expensive. There's a huge push to get lunchtime crowds so it can get competitive price-wise. You just have to know where to look. Oh and online coupons help too but I get free parking already so I can splurge a smidge...and by splurge I mean $10. Grab a bite and a few pics of new stuff going on in the area and it's back to work. 

The elevators in my building downtown still have the floor descriptions in them from the old department store days. It's hard to think that there were more than one of these huge places in the same downtown until you consider that there weren't any outside of downtown so that's where everyone went. Floor after floor of clothes and shoes, and jewelry and home goods. Ah the good old days! And it's all yellowish brown metals and marble in the elevator banks. When you get into the office areas they've been scrubbed of all life because HR knows best but those elevator banks and lobby areas are still as ornate and fancy as they used to be. 

The walk back to my car after work is over is less exciting than you'd think. Sometimes you can hear what inning it is at the Jake or see 7 billion pre-teens milling about in the equivalent of clown makeup for a teen heartthrob concert at the Q or just a line of cars coming in and out of the city...but either way I have to walk that same 20 mins before I can get to my car a retreat to Tremont which is a 1 exit trip on the highway since the bridge they're working on in the flats only goes west-east. One day when I can gather some extra scratch, I'll get my bike fixed and bike to work. That could be fun.

Indians 7 - Chowda 6 (4/6)
Even though we're on like Game 23, Gina, Kerry, and I got to go to the Jake for the Indians game 2 of the 2016 season! It was a smidge chilly but overall ok. It seemed like there were a lot of Bostonians in the crowd that day so I was extra happy when we beat them and most of all happy that they had to pay for hotel rooms and meals to help along our economy. Thanks Boston! You were just as loud as we expected.

There were a load of things that changed since even the end of last year. There are still semi trailers in the outfield, a standing room only section, and a kids play area. Ehh... but there are even less seats to like have to deal with right? It's embarrassing the amount of empty seats for Indian's games and I as a fan shoulder the blame especially when I lived through the sellout era of the 90's. Back then when you got an Indians ticket for an off day batting practice you thanked Jesus, took the day off, and packed the minivan. It was your chance to hob knob with the city's rich and famous! It was the place to be and you were lucky enough to be able to get past the velvet rope.

Now...I think the area's rich and famous have moved on to something else because it sure as hell ain't baseball. I actually think it's retirement so like Florida and Arizona and Europe... you know, not spending a dime here where you got famous. Thanks rich people! So now you only go an Indians game to see fireworks or for opening day because...booze? Nice job. Your tiny dog doesn't need a sweater and your kids don't need VR goggles. You need to fall back in love with Tribe baseball!...especially because your slub ass can't afford a Cavs ticket now that they're good again! Plus if you keep putting it off, at this rate, there won't be any seats left in our fair stadium. There will be a daycare, 2 gas stations, an Applebees, a Best Cuts, and section 8 housing...oh and the filed.

Well kiddos, that's all I got for now. Sometimes you need to shed your baggage urban peeps in order to move forward more easily.



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